The basis of my work at Ethnic Supplies is enabling women if Africa to lift themselves out of poverty. This work bring me in contact with heart wrenching situations especially women that have been abandoned by their husbands and been left holding the babies so to say.
Besi, Milka and Flo
On my last visit to Kabale SW Uganda I was introduced to the basket weavers in this picture. Besi’s story was especially sad. She has nine children and her husband had just abandoned her for a younger woman. With no formal employment or land of her own, the situation was desperate until she found Edirisa a local NGO and through them she was able to access buyers such Ethnic Supplies.
Milka and Flo on the other hand, have husbands at home who have no formal employment, and earn money as casual labourers, but this money is never available for the family to use and is instead spent on beer. I asked the ladies how they use the money the earn from selling baskets and they told me that mostly on the children’s education and health care.
African women have a great deal of responsibility for the family and I strongly believe that they hold the key to economic development.
Earlier today I came across this article from Voice of America that highlights America’s commitment to the education of African girls through USAID and quotes Hillary Clinton’s article in a South African paper in which she too agrees that empowering women is the key to global progress and prosperity
This is serious stuff folk, and I often wonder where I would be if my father like Besi’s husband had decided to abandon us, after all at the time of my birth girls were not afforded an education as they were expected to get married as early as 13 years of ages. Organisations such as the Commonwealth Council work very hard to ensure that girls in the common wealth have access to a decent education and you may recall my post about their work earlier this year. If you missed it here it is
One thing that puzzles me however, is that most African men I have come across on my journey with Ethnic Supplies agree that women need to be helped to become financially independent as they are the core of family and community life, but why isn’t this message getting through to some of the men, like Bessie’s husband?
Do we need to re focus our efforts and resources on the men instead?
August 18, 2009 at 10:43 pm
The reality, of course, educated men, like Charles Taylor in Liberia. Black Economic Empowerment
August 19, 2009 at 4:54 am
I would certainly agree to that, but in addition add educating children as a whole, and by educating I do not just mean maths, English, science etc. Whilst these subjects are important, Africa needs more entrepreneurs who are able to shine one the global stage through not only innovation, but business savvy. Educating children I personally believe is the key to eradicating poverty in Africa.
Discrimination against women in Africa is a generational attribute one which many older men inherited and were taught by their forefathers, I would therefore add that not only is academic and entrepreneurial education important for young boys and girls but also equality education. One which clearly enlightens children, particularly young boys to respect women and see them as equals. It has to be a cultural shift, after all more great African minds working together will help Africa Women have a very special place in Africa, after all it is called the ‘motherland’!
August 19, 2009 at 7:06 am
Yes discrimination against women is a great starting point. The educating of children and Africa for that matter I think rest with women. Women wield a lot of power/influence on children and have the ability to influence some fo these attitudes from a very early age.
On our part as Africans we owe it to ourselves to rebrand the image of the continent
August 19, 2009 at 12:07 pm
As much as I am a firm believer in the push to educate and empower women and children, I’m concerned that young men are left without suitable role models to follow. This can lead to instability within societies….what are your thoughts?
August 19, 2009 at 1:08 pm
Hi Patricia,
Welcome to the discussion. I must say I had not given it much thought but I can see where you are coming from with yur thoughts on this. We need to ahve have the right balance. Boys are brought up by women and the messages “sent” out to young men need to be looked at too
August 19, 2009 at 1:16 pm
I agree with Patricia’ comment, role models are very important. But African male role models already exist, Nelson Mandela being the foremost and most obvious that comes to my mind. Do we need more? Of course we do, having more role models, not just men, but women as well will ensure Africa as a continent continues to grow.
We have to remember though, that whilst Africa as a continent is old, the freedom and independence of Africa is still very fresh, as a result it will take time for mentalities to shift. To an extent we are fortunate that we live in a globalised world, because this has allowed many Africans to experience various cultures and see what works and what doesn’t work and integrate that into our societies and cultures.
August 19, 2009 at 1:31 pm
Mandela is a great example but if you don’t mind me saying so, not one a young man in Zambia, Zimbabwe or even Senegal, may relate it to? I would be minded to advocate for fathers in homes as a good start. This would take into account how fathers conduct themselves in and out of the home, whether they take tiem out for the young men, do they go out to work etc.
I hear what you are saying Tichaona, about Africa’s independence and freedom being new, but I can’t help but wonder some of what was good about the old system has been left behind. It was very hard to find men who just abandoned their families the way Besi was.
August 19, 2009 at 3:29 pm
I agree Ida, no prominent male role models have come out of Zimbabwe, Zambia or Senegal, but do they always need to be prominent? Strive Masiyiwa (Econet Wireless founder) has been a role model for many young Zimbabwean men, and I am sure there are a few others in Zimbabwe, Zambia or Senegal, but sometimes their prominence is not evident.
Your comment regarding advocacy for fathers in the home to be the role model is very true. My father is my hero and so is my mother, both very equally important. My father has the utmost respect for my mother and ensured she had every chance to make her career flourish which it has. I do agree that sometimes the role models need to come from within the family and the immediate community or village. Whilst I was born in 1981 and never experienced living in the village, my late grand father used to always share stories with me on how the Chief was respected and looked up to. In my own personal opinion whether he was the right role model, could be argued.
Cultures evolve and with the evolution comes displacement, resistance to change and adjustments. That is just the world we live in. Men have found it easier to abandon their wives because many of them would leave the villages in search of fortune in the cities and whilst there would encounter other women, as such the family in the village would become a distant memory and almost a burden, which is wholly wrong and unacceptable. But unfortunately this has been part of the evolution process. Ventures such as yours as to be highly commended, as that is part of the phase of evolution, let people help themselves out of poverty. As the old saying goes, “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you feed him for a life time”.
August 19, 2009 at 3:47 pm
oops, the mentioning of Zimbabwe, Zambia and Senegal was a figure of speech. That example goes for most African countries. In Most African countries young men would sooner view English footballers as role models than the great Man!
What this tells me is that they (the footballers) represent something that many may see as being within easy reach for them, or rather something that they too could achieve? Would you agree with that?
August 19, 2009 at 4:09 pm
Hi all,
(electricity’s back and so am I)
Madiba (bless him) is someone we can all draw great inspiration from. However, it’s younger men that I had in mind when I made that comment.
One of the topics that The Patricia Show covered in Season 1 was called “The redundant male?”. We discussed this very topic and we concluded that, for eg. young men in their 20’s need African role models that they understand, even if it’s through the world of entertainment…K’Naan, D’Banj.
Our traditions are fast changing (we are a continent in transition, after all)and so yes, it is imperative that the role of fatherhood and other male mentors is examined.
I hear stories of women are working hard only for their spouses to beat them silly AND take their earnings. This same woman may be working to instill a sense of responsibility, care and love in their sons yet if these same sons see that the relationship between mama na baba is not a nuturing one, the cycle will unfortunatley continue.
In Kenya the divorce rate is alarmingly high ( not to mention the unfulfilling marriages.) Women saw Mama suffering in silence so they continue in pain or get toy boys(btw,that’s a growing fad here). Guys know a remote father and don’t know different even though the globalised world they live in tells them that that is not the only way. But how to break that chain…..??? And getting these couples to talk (here I’m talking middle class professionals) is even harder (believe me, I’m still trying)
Let’s keep talking……
August 19, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Lol, I realised it was a figure of speech. My point was more on “prominence” than anything else, and once again your example of footballers brings this to light. However in the specific example of footballers being role models, I believe that it is what they stand for (i.e. status) and how much money they make playing the game, so it comes back down to wealth (whether young men understand what true wealth actually is in another story altogether).
Regarding your question as to whether they see themselves as achieving international status by being a world renowned footballer, is that not what aspiration is all about, and what we encourage the children to have? “What ever the mind can believe, the mind can achieve” springs to mind, and whilst footballers may not be considered the “ideal” role model, their wealth (or rather money) and status can help them to become Ambassadors for their countries. Many African footballers in the Premier League do assist a number of charities in Africa, and because the FA rules are so strict, they are forced to be role models, so that is not such a bad thing is it?
August 20, 2009 at 8:35 am
@Patricia very valid comments and I think we are all in agreement that Africa is a continent in transition very similar to the way other continents with deep routed cultures have evolved, India and China spring to mind. I think we are also in agreement that for our continent to change, attitudes and mentalities need to change, and I have always strongly believed it is easier to teach a child new things, than some one who is much older. This is why once again I emphasise that when it comes to change it needs to be taught in schools, youth centres, village communities. Lets face facts, a man who has been abusing his wife for 20 plus years is not suddenly going to change over night, I am not saying it is impossible, but rather unlikely?
In reference to your comments regarding the divorce rate in Kenya, that once again is a transition element. I maybe naïve as I am 28, but in the mid 1900s divorce was very very uncommon. Whilst I am not saying divorce is a good thing, breaking up a home is never a good thing, but if it is an abusive relationship then well done to the woman for taking a stand and starting a fresh, she is better of on her own than with an abusive husband. Regarding the “toy boy” effect, whilst I am neither pro nor against, people can love whoever they love as long as it is for the right reasons, it has potential adverse effects.
There are many initiatives out there in helping Africa progress, education is just one, and by that I mean the right education. Educating not just girls, but young boys for me will always be the answer for me in solving many of Africa’s problems.